Thursday, October 28, 2004

The Relationship Catch 22

Let's pretend there is this guy. Be sure to recognize that this guy isn't me. To make sure this guy isn't me we will call him Frank. He will have red, curly hair. I don't have red, curly hair. He also has an extensive ABBA collection which is also something I don't nor would never have. Let's not dwell on his poor music taste but instead get to this tale. Just so the girls can play at this game too, you can pretend that Frank is a girl and her name is Francine. She is more of a Jars of Clay fan and has long black hair. She also is not me.

Have we established this isn't me yet?

So, Frank finds himself falling for a very good friend of his. His friend just happens to be a girl which is probably one of the reasons he fell for her. In Francine's case, she fell for a guy who also is not me -- for the record. Though she'd have a better chance with me because she has a better musical taste alone -- plus she's a girl. So Frank/Francine had this really great friend. This friend that they spent lots of time with and felt they could totally connect with. For a long while, all he/she felt for this person was friendship. The cruellness of life has caused them to have other feelings. Those feelings just happen to be really strong for this person. You can't blame Frank/Francine because the object of their affection just happens to be a really amazing friend and person.

Frank/Francine decides to take the plunge and admit their feelings to their friend. Even though they don't know how the friend may feel back. As this story decides to tell itself, it just so happens this friend does not return those feelings. This person has decided that the friendship route is the better route. Frank/Francine is a little hurt but values the friendship so much that they decide to not let it get to them.

The decision is made between the two that nothing will change between them They will remain friends. Everything will be exactly the same. That my dear readers is where the problem arises.

Frank/Francine gets attacked by bloodthirsty pirates??? NO! Are you even paying attention? Pirates don't even make sense in this story. Besides, this story is more of a sorry attempt to get a point across. Maybe I'll save the pirates for another time. No, Frank is safe from any pirates. Though I think Francine may have a crush on the captain.

Where was I? Oh yes, the problem. The problem is that nothing has changed. That they have decided to do everything exactly like they have done before. Frank/Francine is now facing a dillema. What do they do now?

You see, they fell for this person through the friendship. The attraction arised while the friendship grew. By doing exactly what they are doing now, Frank grew to have feelings for the girl. Doing exactly the same thing probably means those feelings are going to stay around and play for awhile.

So what does Frank/Francine do? And no, he doesn't walk the plank. Please stop thinking about pirates. Sheesh.

Frank could let the girl of his affection know that keeping things exactly the same is making it hard on him. He thinks that they should take a break. Or the very least. tone the friendship down a little. Maybe not open up to each other or spend as much time together.

You know what? He won't. He liked this person. He likes the attention he gets. He loves spending time with this person. This person is probably someone who is the highlight of his day. This is someone who he holds very special. He looks forward to these moments with this person. As much as he gets hurt by spending time. As much as his feeling stick around because nothing between them has changed. Frank doesn't want to alter the relationship because deep down he still wants to be with this person. He still cherishes spending the time that they have.

It's a catch 22. Frank is hurt if he keeps on letting the friendship remain the same. Frank is also hurt if he ends up spending less time with his dear friend. No one likes losing a friend. Especially a friend that you have strong attachment.

I feel sorry for poor Frank. Afterall, I hear some pirates just took all his loot. Those jerks.

Saturday, October 09, 2004


I think, it's time to admit that I'm not a teenager anymore. I watched the film 'The Punisher' with a crowd that was a few years younger than I and within that crowd was some teenage males. The proclamations of awesome and amazing were spewed out after this film. I instead was ready to spew something else out. 'The Punisher' seemed to have the goal of being able to desensitize the viewer to the world of violence as much as possible. Or maybe the problem is that the viewer already is pretty accustomed to oodles of unneeded violence in their entertainment diet. Thus the movie feels it needs to up the ante to still leave an impact. The movie had heaps of killing but in all that gory glory, they seemed to have forgot sometimes it's nice to have a story in there too. Maybe the story starts happening after the closing credit because I'll admit I turned it off before then. I'm pretty sure they wanted there to be some overall message. All I got was that the bad people need to have really gory deaths.

It's not a movie that really sat well with me. I'll admit there was a few fight scenes that the male side of me took over and wanted to do the obligatory fist pumping. I'm a guy and fighting is fun to watch. Watching families get killed doesn't thrill me. Torturous type death scenes don't get me too giddy either. I rather feel disturbed. Sometimes disturbed is okay. I've watched many films with gore and carnage. Usually there is an overal message and story. That despite being grim, I still feel I can learn or get something out of it. This was just an action movie that decided instead of action we will substitute carnage.

But man, there was one wild fight scene. Too bad I don't see myself wanting to take another viewing at 'The Punisher'. You can always play that fun game, try to find the thin plot in order to justify the choas!

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Hmmm. . . this place seems familiar

The end of August I packed up my bags and headed out of Medeba. I found myself back in my hometown of Brantford, living in the basement of my parents. It was nice being back in Brantford. It was really nice having free food and no rent. As life would have it, Brantford doesn't feel so much like my home anymore but rather a place I like to visit from time to time. A month later, which for you keen folks you've figured out was the end of September, I found myself with my bags packed heading back to Medeba.

Surprise, I'm back at Medeba. Maybe I'll end up being a lifer afterall. Truth is, I've known since the middle of August that it would be very likely I'd be here again. I love it here. This place does feel like home.

Unfortunately, my new job at Medeba doesn't quite feel like home. It more feels like I'm stuck in a wild tornado that's destined to send me to Oz. At this point, I'm not sure if I'm Dorothy or Toto. I don't really look that great in a dress and I am a hairy young man. I'll leave up for the reader to decide my fate. I'm feeling a litte lost in my new job but I'm also really excited about it. It's something new and I'm geared up for a challenge.

This where you are asking yourself, so what's the job??? I can't blame you for asking because I haven't told many folks about it. Actually, I know almost all of you didn't know I was destined to head back up here in lovely ol' West Guilford. That's mainly because it was a big secret and typically secrets aren't things I should be posting on Blogs. I hope the surprise was worth the wait. I apologize for not providing any cake or noise makers.

Oh yeah, the job I now have. My official title is Guest Group Coordinator. When I know what that all means myself than I'll be happy to tell you all. It invovles a lot of talking to people which basically means it's a job meant for me. I like my talking and I usuallu prefer to do it with people. The camp cat, Mouser, isn't a shabby listener herself. She also isn't going to give me a group of 80 to book for a weekend. Hey, if any of you have a group looking for a retreat, I am now your man. Unless one of your requested activities is 'chase the Guest Group Coordinator around with pointy stick and poke him until Skittles come out.' I'm still recovering from the last weekend and have decided it's not an activity I would rather run. Speaking of running, how about those cheetahs? Fast little critters. Not that I have ever raced one.

On a totally different note (yes it's true no Cheetah will be mentioned in this paragraph -- except for that one I did mention -- oops)I had me a root canal and leg surgery. Thankfully not at the same time. Not quite sure if I could have handled to wait for such an operation. I was inspired to run away a few times when the countdown was happening for the root canal. Both ended up going really well and I was just a big wuss for being afraid of them. I now have some cool stitches in my leg. I hear girls dig the stitches. I better make use of stitches now since they come out in a week. I'm fine with that because these suckers are itchy.

Maybe I should have stuck with the cheetahs????