Wednesday, December 30, 2015

The In-Depth and Spoiler-Filled Breakdown of 'Star Wars: The Force Awakens'


Star Wars: The Force Awakens is on track to be the highest grossing movie of all time and it is definitely the most talked about movie right now. The Breakdown knows you just can't get enough of the Force, which is why we're serving up a heaping dose of in-depth and spoiler-filled analysis of the hottest motion picture in cinemas. We look at all the major twist and turns, discuss what made them effective, what didn't work, and make some predictions for the future of the franchise. If you want our non-spoiler review then check out last week's show. As always if you enjoy the show then please spread the word, because that is how we can keep on making more.

Remember you can now subscribe either to The Movie Breakdown feed (a subscription link is at the top right hand of this site) or on iTunes.



Critical Darling Ranking: 

Scott: 140 points 

1. Carol - 15 points 
2. Brooklyn - 15 points 
3. Macbeth - 20 points
4. 99 Homes - 15 points 
5. Joy - 0 points
6. Good Dinosaur - 10 points 
7. Suffragette - 10 points 
8. Hateful Eight - 10 points
9. Room - 15 points 
10. Sicario - 15 points 
Fool’s Gamble: 15 points 

Christopher: 55 points

1. The Revenant - 10 points
2. The Danish Girl - 0 points 
3. Spotlight - 15 points 
4. I Saw the Light - 0 points (Moved to March 2016)
5. Crimson Peak - 0 points 
6. Steve Jobs - 10 points 
7. Youth - 10 points
8. Truth - 0 points 
9. Our Brand is Crisis - (-5) points 
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens 15 points

Monday, December 21, 2015

The Breakdown of 'Star Wars: The Force Awakens', 'Spotlight', 'Sisters', 'In the Heart of the Sea' and 'The Ridiculous 6'


This week the Breakdown reviews five pictures including one that is among the best of the year and another that is one of the worst. We know you don't care about that and what you really want is the review of the most hotly anticipated movie ever, Star Wars: The Force Awakens. This is the movie we've been itching to talk about all year and now it is here. As always if you love the show then please spread the word as a growing base of listeners is the best way we can keep doing this.

Remember you can now subscribe either to The Movie Breakdown feed (a subscription link is at the top right hand of this site) or on iTunes.


The Podcast Outline:

00:50 Star Wars: The Force Awakens review
25:39 Sisters review
34:47 In the Heart of the Sea review
44:57 Spotlight review
1:01:51 Ridiculous 6 review
1:10:07 Critical Darling Update
1:14:16 Box Office Update
1:19:14 BB8 talk

1:22:00 Hear me completely forget to to a review rundown


Rating Rundown:

Star Wars: The Force Awakens **** (CS) & ***½(SM)
Sisters *** (CS) & **½ (SM)
In the Heart of the Seas ** (CS & SM)
Spotlight **** (CS & SM)
Ridiculous 6 ½* (CS) & 0 (SM) 

Critical Darling Ranking: 

Scott: 130 points 

1. Carol - 15 points 
2. Brooklyn - 15 points 
3. Macbeth - 20 points
4. 99 Homes - 15 points 
5. Joy
6. Good Dinosaur - 10 points 
7. Suffragette - 10 points 
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room - 15 points 
10. Sicario - 15 points 
Fool’s Gamble: 15 points 

Christopher: 45 points

1. The Revenant
2. The Danish Girl - 0 points 
3. Spotlight - 15 points 
4. I Saw the Light - 0 points (Moved to March 2016)
5. Crimson Peak - 0 points 
6. Steve Jobs - 10 points 
7. Youth - 10 points
8. Truth - 0 points 
9. Our Brand is Crisis - (-5) points 
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens 15 points

Monday, December 14, 2015

The Breakdown of the Legacy of Star Wars Podcast


It is only a few days away from one of the biggest movie events of all time, Star Wars: Force Awakens. In order to celebrate this huge occasion, we're delving into the rich history and impact of the unforgettable franchise set a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.. Jump on the hype train and celebrate the legacy of Star Wars. As always if you love the show, then please spread the word.


Remember you can now subscribe either to The Movie Breakdown feed (a subscription link is at the top right hand of this site) or on iTunes.

Tuesday, December 08, 2015

Sylvester Stallone Goes 'No Blood'


It looks like I owe Sylvester Stallone apology. Deadline is now reporting that Stallone has backed out of the Rambo and Son: New Blood project, and now we'll never find out what happens to Colonel Trautman's window. Or I'm assuming Fox is going to do the smart thing and realize that a Rambo without Stallone involved in any capacity isn't Rambo. It is just some muscled up ex-Vietnam soldier who has a kid, which doesn't quite have the same hook without all the history of blowing up Communist right out of their boots. Stallone clearly still can make right decisions and maybe realized that it is best not to Norbit his chances at a Best Supporting Actor Oscar. I'm sure we still have a gazillion Expendables on the way, but at least during awards seasons, Stallone has proven to make better career choices than Eddie Murphy.

Monday, December 07, 2015

The Breakdown of Things That Aren't So Bad


This week's episode is being called The Breakdown of Things That Aren't So Bad, where we'll be defending genres and cinematic elements that for the last three years we've endlessly complained about. This is the week where you'll hear Scott say good things about CGI and I defend Hollywood's obsession with the cinematic universe (also known as every studio copying Marvel). As always if you love the show then please spread the word.

Remember you can now subscribe either to The Movie Breakdown feed (a subscription link is at the top right hand of this site) or on iTunes



Critical Darling Ranking: 

Scott: 130 points 

1. Carol - 15 points 
2. Brooklyn - 15 points 
3. Macbeth - 20 points
4. 99 Homes - 15 points 
5. Joy
6. Good Dinosaur - 10 points 
7. Suffragette - 10 points 
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room - 15 points 
10. Sicario - 15 points 
Fool’s Gamble: 15 points 

Christopher: 30 points

1. The Revenant
2. The Danish Girl - 0 points 
3. Spotlight - 15 points 
4. I Saw the Light - 0 points (Moved to March 2016)
5. Crimson Peak - 0 points 
6. Steve Jobs - 10 points 
7. Youth - 10 points
8. Truth - 0 points 
9. Our Brand is Crisis - (-5) points 
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens

Friday, December 04, 2015

'The Nice Guys' Trailer Blares Its Intentions of Being an Atypical Summer Blockbuster Actioner


The Nice Guys is the kind of picture that 35 years ago would have been targeting to be a summer blockbuster. All the elements that would have made it huge mainstream entertainment then, is why it is peculiar that it is currently slotted for the franchise heavy month of May. It's an adult-aiming buddy action-comedy with unsavoury characters that is noirish, violent, profane, sexy, stylish, and star-driven. If this movie came out in the 1970s or early 1980s then the plot of two opposites being forced together to solve a missing person case that uncovers some bigger crimes would be lost in a sea of similar pictures (48 Hrs. immediately jumped out at me, which was a huge hit in 1982). Now, the summer months are filled with franchise pictures about super heroes focused on saving the entire world from an imminent catastrophe that are sanitized and 'safe' to sell to the teenage crowd, which makes a story about solving a disappearance that has ample amount of nudity, swearing and is subversive feel fresh and original today. Ryan Gosling as the bumbling private investigator is pretty great in this trailer and has a solid chemistry with Russell Crowe's tough guy who is willing to lob the softballs to make the pairing work. I love the old-school WB logo, the 1977 Los Angeles setting, and the comedy doesn't cover up the edge. I can find Shane Black directorial and writing style to be a little too self-aware at times, but he has also proven to be quite adept at jumping between genres in a single movie. This has skyrocketed right to the top of my most anticipated 2016 summer pictures.


Thursday, December 03, 2015

You Really Can Watch Both


You either have to be incredibly confident in the quality of your picture or just have given up hope for success to slot your movie on the same weekend as what is being pegged as one of the all-time biggest movie events. Yet we have Sisters hoping to be the ultimate counter-programming to the juggernaut known as Star Wars: The Force Awakens. If you base everything off their self-aware and willing to poke fun of themselves marketing campaign along with having two of the most likable people in all of Hollywood in Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, then you'd have a hard time not rooting for some big success. If the movie is half as fun and charming as this trailer then it will be well worth making December 18th a double-bill night.


DC Comic Movies Might Dare to Crack Jokes, After All


Man of Steel and Zach Snyder's entire filmography has made me apprehensive about getting on board the Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice love train. This new trailer still shows lot of the irritating Snyder-isms like the obsession with explosions wiping out an entire city and everything having a metallic shade to it. This trailer has given me some sparks of hope that the DC Comics run at movie glory isn't going to be sunk with gloomy and over-serious storytelling. The final sequence in this trailer shows just a tad of a sense of humour with the exchange between Batman and Superman wondering where Wonder Woman came from. You toss that in along with Jesse Eisenberg's flamboyant and energetic take of Lex Luthor and there are signs the picture may have a bounce in its step and some self-awareness. There seems to be some actual character-driven drama, like the fun tension filled party scene between the alter-egos, to balance with the ear drum rattling and retina scarring city toppling action scenes that are sure to be in abundance.

I can't shake the thought that in an attempt to outdo Marvel's Captain America: Civil War trailer that Warner Brothers has shown too much like Superman unmasking Batman. I have a tingling sense the trailer went Amazing Spider-Man 2 by revealing the final shot of the film with our heroes standing tall together to battler Doomsday right before the end credits roll to leave us excited for the impending Justice League movie. When I say "excited", of course I mean annoyed we got left with a feature-length commercial for another movie. For now, I'll ignore those instincts and be optimistic there is a whole hour that hasn't been spoiled.


Tuesday, December 01, 2015

For All Those that Thought 'Creed' Signified a New and In Touch Sylvester Stallone. . .


There were massive celebrations in the streets when the Ryan Coogler directed and Michael B. Jordan starring Creed turned out to be an excellent addition to the Rocky franchise. Okay fine, it was just me loudly humming the classic theme of the original while shadow boxing my way home after seeing the fantastic film. I was delightfully surprised that it wasn't about Adonis Johnson failing in the ring so that Rocky Balboa could win the title one more time. Sylvester Stallone remained a supporting character while letting Jordan shine, and in turn Stallone may have earned himself a serious shot at a Best Supporting Oscar due to delivering one of his best performances in several years (if not decades).

I was all ready to declare that Stallone finally seems to have come to terms with where he is in the entertainment world and he has stopped flailing for that action and blockbuster star golden ring. I was hoping we'd maybe get a few more heartfelt and surprising acting showcases in some understated dramatic roles.

And then Deadline reported that there are serious plans for a Rambo TV series, which will be about Rambo and his son, J.R. Of course, it has to be called New Blood, because they have to make up for the fact that the fifth Rambo never was released so we were robbed of the title Last Blood (I believe that was the one where Rambo hunted Osama Bin Laden but then real Americas soldiers had to spoil that). Now, if they really want to spread out the franchise with video games, web series, stage musicals and talk shows then we can also finally get More Blood, Red Blood, Smeared Blood, and No Blood.

The biggest news is obviously that Stallone having a more understated role in Creed and not even having his grubby finger on the script was a fluke. A fluke that our beloved champion of action cinema won't allow to happen again. Apparently, there are even rumbling of an Expendables series, and that franchise will likely have roughly 8 more sequels to allow every aging action star a pay day. I'm sure by the end of this week that we'll also learn about the Netflix series for Tango & Cash, the animated adaptation of Cobra, and the remake of Stop! Or My Mom will Shoot (rest in peace, Estelle Getty).

The second biggest news is: when the hell did Rambo find time to settle down and have a kid while he was busy blowing up communists and small towns? Is this canon? Did he mumble something about a son right before he blew that soldier out of his boots? I'll assume that J.R, did exist prior to this, but that doesn't mean anyone wants to see Rambo in a weekly series especially with his son tagging along. We've already seen what happens when you throw in a sudden offspring to a beloved franchise with Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Which actually makes me wonder if in-between watching all his movies and hiding under paper bags, if Shia LaBeouf would have time to play J.R, and kill this franchise too. I'm all for more reasons to not watch it.

For something really different, I think they should make this a half hour family sitcom about Rambo trying to make up for J.R.'s lost childhood. They can have an episode where Rambo over throws the ball during a game of catch and it goes through Colonel Trautman's window and they hide behind some rose bushes. But then J.R. teaches his father the importance of honesty and they come clean at the end while piano music plays. I also think each week Rambo does something to Trautman like smear mustard on his new tuxedo or sell his car for an ice cream cone, but then must apologize every week. This type of storytelling will allow it to last 12 seasons, I'd guess.

There is debate if Sylvester Stallone will star in this or just produce. I think we already all know the answer. If Shia can't get cast, then Stallone will just end up playing Rambo and his son.


Monday, November 30, 2015

In Case You Were Wondering if Rob Schneider Still Gets Work


If you wanted a clear explanation of why movie columnist and critics call the month of January by the name "Dumpuary" then I present to you Norm of the North. The new trailer makes this feature look like a straight-to-video knock-off of Disney's largely unknown The Wild that most like to label a Madagascar knock-off. So essentially about 50% of the movies my son picks for us to see from Netflix (no denying that I'll be forced to see this soon enough). If the really bad puns and jokes, dated animation, and worn-out premise wasn't enough to win you over then how about the lead character being voiced by Rob Schneider. I knew there was a sense of being dragged kicking and screaming to a nightmare of my past while watching this trailer. This may have achieved the monumental task of making Nut Job 2 the most appealing animated feature in January 2015. Bravo.


The Breakdown of 'The Good Dinosaur' and 'Creed'


This week on The Breakdown, Scott and Christopher review five pictures including two big new releases in the return of Rocky in Creed and Pixar's latest sweeping animated adventure, The Good Dinosaur. We also go way back in time to discuss and review a classic from the silent era of cinema, The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari. As always if you love the show then please spread the word.

Remember you can now subscribe either to The Movie Breakdown feed (a subscription link is at the top right hand of this site) or on iTunes



Podcast Outline:

00:58 The Good Dinosaur review
19:42 Creed review
35:11 The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari review
43:58 Wild Tales review
51:08 Honeymoon review
59:08 Box Office Update
1:06:25 Critical Darling Update
1:10:37 Review Rundown

Rating Rundown:

The Good Dinosaur ***½ (CS) & *** (SM)
Creed **** (CS) *& ***½ (SM)
The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari **** (CS & SM)
Wild Tales **** (CS) & ***½ (SM)
Honeymoon *** (CS & SM)




Critical Darling Ranking: 

Scott: 110 points 

1. Carol - 15 points 
2. Brooklyn - 15 points 
3. Macbeth
4. 99 Homes - 15 points 
5. Joy
6. Good Dinosaur - 10 points 
7. Suffragette - 10 points 
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room - 15 points 
10. Sicario - 15 points 
Fool’s Gamble: 15 points 

Christopher: 20 points

1. The Revenant
2. The Danish Girl - 0 points 
3. Spotlight - 15 points 
4. I Saw the Light - 0 points (Moved to March 2016)
5. Crimson Peak - 0 points 
6. Steve Jobs - 10 points 
7. Youth
8. Truth - 0 points 
9. Our Brand is Crisis - (-5) points 
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens

Monday, November 23, 2015

The Breakdown of 'The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2' and 'Spectre'


This week Scott and Christopher review five pictures including the final installment of one of the biggest modern franchises in The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2. As well we finally get around to reviewing Spectre, look at Noah Baumbach's latest, and one of Guillermo Del Toro's first pictures. As always if you enjoy the show then please spread the love.

Remember you can now subscribe either to The Movie Breakdown feed (a subscription link is at the top right hand corner on this site) or on iTunes.



Podcast Outline:

1:08 The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2 review
13:33 Spectre review
21:24 While We're Young review
31:24 Mimic review
40:40 Champs review
51:00 Critical Darlings Update & The Night Before mini-review
54:49 Box Office Update
1:02:52 Review Rundown

Ratings Rundown:

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2 **½ (CS) & *** (SM)
Spectre **½ (CS)
While We're Young ***½ (CS & SM)
Mimic ***½ (CS) & *** (SM)
Champs **½ (CS) & ***½ (SM)

Critical Darling Score: 

Scott: 100 points 

1. Carol - 15 points
2. Brooklyn - 15 points
3. Macbeth
4. 99 Homes - 15 points
5. Joy
6. Good Dinosaur
7. Suffragette - 10 points
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room - 15 points
10. Sicario - 15 points
Fool’s Gamble: 15 points

Christopher: 20 points
1. The Revenant
2. The Danish Girl
3. Spotlight - 15 points
4. I Saw the Light 0 points (Moved to March 2016)
5. Crimson Peak 0 points
6. Steve Jobs 10 points
7. Youth
8. Truth - 0 points
9. Our Brand is Crisis - (-5) points
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens

Thursday, November 19, 2015

To Answer the Question if 'The Movie Breakdown' Will Ever be on iTunes

Yesterday, I announced a dedicated feed for The Movie Breakdown podcast and for the extra savvy, you likely were able to guess what was coming next. I mind as well reveal now that The Movie Breakdown has its very own shiny and pretty iTunes page where you can subscribe to the shows there if that is your style. Or you can subscribe to the podcast feed or you can just keep on listening to it on the website. You have options and that is what has made Harvey's restaurants so successful (and the fact that people like hamburgers, which I confess our podcast lacks).

I have to be honest that I've been dragging my feet on putting the podcast on iTunes. Mainly, because it would put some restriction on how I could monetize it and close some other potential avenues and deals that I want to explore with the show. I also realize those avenues aren't currently here now, so I mind as well put it up on iTunes for now and pull it later just when you get comfortable with it there.

For now if iTunes is the way you want to subscribe just fire up the service and search The Movie Breakdown. There are currently close to hundred episodes of the show up and we'll be rocking new goodness on a weekly basis. As always, if you love the show then please spread the word.

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Feeding the Need by Finally Fixing a Major Blog and Podcast Gripe


After only wanting to do this for the last five years, I finally fired up the very easy to use Feedburner.com and roasted me a delicious official feed for The International House of Spicer. For most this doesn't change anything, but for those that prefer to follow sites via the feed reader of their choosing it is now much easier. You can now subscribe to the feed and be notified whenever a post has been published. At this point, I think the feed version is whole lot less pretty than the actual site, but the words will be just as delectable as ever.

There has also been a few shouting to the heavens that they wanted the Breakdown podcasts to be easier to listen or essentially, have options to listen to it off the site on the device of their choosing like a real podcast. I've now burned a feed that is entirely dedicated to the podcast, which will make for convenient listening.

At the present time on the sidebar, there are two nicely labelled icons to subscribe to the feeds. I don't like the logo and the design of them at all, but that entire side of the site is a mess and in need of a major overhaul. In the coming weeks, I hope to clean that area up and make it prettier. For now, my bigger concern is to actually get regular content on here to make those feeds all the more enticing.

Monday, November 16, 2015

The Breakdown of the Social Media Effect


This week Scott and I look at how the rise of the internet and major sites like Twitter and Facebook have drastically changed how we watch and discuss movies. The movie world is a very different place than even a decade ago where trailers are often bigger deals than the movies (Star Wars Force Awakens trailer probably garnered more reviews and debate than any movie released this year), rumours are now treated like news, and "spoiler alert" is one of the most often typed words on forums and blogs. As always if you love the show then please spread the word.


Monday, November 09, 2015

The Movie Breakdown of A Nightmare on Elm Street, Clouds of Silas Maria, Big Trouble in Little China, and 1408


This week Scott and I review four pictures including 1980s genre favourites in A Nightmare on Elm Street and Big Trouble in Little China. After that we discuss the rise of streaming and how it will affect the industry. As always if you enjoy the show then please spread the world.




Podcast Outline:

04:08  A Nightmare on Elm Street review
24:14  Clouds of Sils Maria review
39:35  Big Trouble in Little China review
58:48 1408 review
1:14:57 The rise of streaming services
1:28:43 Critical Darling Update & Everett's Trick or Treat Adventures
1:35:58 Box Office Update
1:38:22 Review Rundown

Rating Rundown:

A Nightmare on Elm Street **** (CS & SM)
Clouds of Sils Maria ***½ (CS & SM)
Big Trouble in Little China **** (CS) & ***½ (SM)
1408 *** (CS & SM)

Critical Darling Draft Pick:

Scott: 85 points

1. Carol
2. Brooklyn - 15 points
3. Macbeth
4. 99 Homes - 15 points
5. Joy
6. Good Dinosaur
7. Suffragette - 10 points
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room - 15 points
10. Sicario - 15 points
Fool’s Gamble: 15 points

Christopher: 20 points

1. The Revenant
2. The Danish Girl
3. Spotlight - 15 points
4. I Saw the Light 0 points (Moved to March 2016)
5. Crimson Peak 0 points
6. Steve Jobs 10 points
7. Youth
8. Truth - 0 points
9. Our Brand is Crisis - (-5) points
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens

Monday, November 02, 2015

The Breakdown of Horror Podcast


Halloween may be over, but that doesn't mean we need to stop watching scary movies. Scott and I embrace the things that bump in the night with our special Breakdown of Horror podcast where we review five pictures including Guillermo Del Toro's latest, Crimson Peak and the John Carpenter cult classic, The Thing.

As always, if you love the show then please spread the word.



Podcast Outline:

00:56 Crimson Peak review
19: 50 The Thing review
33:07 The Babadook review
46:00 Circle review
53:06 Drag Me to Hell review
59:46 Weekend Box Office Update
1:07:15 Critical Darling Contest Update
1:10:58 Review Rundown

Rating Rundown:

Crimson Peak ***½ (CS) & **½ (SM)
The Thing **** (CS  & SM)
The Babadook **** (CS & SM)
Circle *½ (CS) * & *(SM)
Drag Me to Hell *** (CS & SM)


Critical Darling Draft Pick:

Scott: 70 points

1. Carol
2. Brooklyn
3. Macbeth
4. 99 Homes - 15 points
5. Joy
6. Good Dinosaur
7. Suffragette - 10 points
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room - 15 points
10. Sicario - 15 points
Fool’s Gamble: 15 points

Christopher: 5 points

1. The Revenant
2. The Danish Girl
3. Spotlight
4. I Saw the Light 0 points (Moved to March 2016)
5. Crimson Peak 0 points
6. Steve Jobs 10 points
7. Youth
8. Truth - 0 points
9. Our Brand is Crisis - (-5) points
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens

Monday, October 26, 2015

The Breakdown of Steve Jobs, Beasts of No Nation, and Bridge of Spies Podcast


This week Scott and I review three 2015 releases, including the Aaron Sorkin penned and Danny Boyle directed biopic, Steve Jobs. Then from there we talk about the unparalleled excitement surrounding Star Wars: The Force Awakens, and speaking of fan craze, we look at the dark side where fans on social media attack casts and filmmakers when they don't make the movies they envision.

As always if you love the show then please spread the word.




Rating Rundown:

Steve Jobs **** (CS) & ***½ (SM)
Beasts of No Nation ***½ (CS & SM)
Bridge of Spies ***½ (CS & SM)

Critical Darling Scoreboard:

Scott: 55 points 

1. Carol
2. Brooklyn
3. Macbeth
4. 99 Homes - 15 points
5. Joy
6. Good Dinosaur
7. Suffragette - 10 points
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room - 15 points
10. Sicario - 15 points

 Christopher: 10 points
1. The Revenant
2. The Danish Girl
3. Spotlight
4. I Saw the Light 0 points (Moved to March 2016)
5. Crimson Peak 0 points 
6. Steve Jobs 10 points
7. Youth
8. Truth - 0 points
9. Our Brand is Crisis
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens

Monday, October 19, 2015

Harnessing Irrepressible Joy from an Empty Coffee Cup


Being a parent of young kids is a portal back to your childhood. I'm not just talking about the built-in excuse for being able to play with Safari Lego sets, twirling around in the living room to the theme of Ghostbusters, or building a fort for protection against imaginary sea monsters. The real connection to our younger selves is being reminded by your child that the world warrants unabashed, enthusiastic, bubbling joy over even the simple things. This means running around and cheering when correctly predicting the sponge animal that came from the capsule, getting incomparable pleasure from trying to get your dad to guess if the song you're singing was learned from class or made up on the spot, or leaping in the air to see if you have what it takes to turn into a proper rabbit.


A little while back, Everett and I were going on our usual morning journey to his school and he was serenading me with the songs he learned the previous day. He then suddenly burst into uncontrollable laughter, the type that usually only happens when someone lets a fart slip by or he has been able to tickle daddy into submission. Neither had happened and I was about to ask him what was so joyously hilarious.

"There is a coffee cup on that tree."

 
Somebody had decided they could no longer carry their empty Tim Horton cup due to the great weight it was obviously putting upon their arm, so they stuck it on a branch.

"A silly person put a coffee cup on that tree. Coffee cups don't go on trees. This is so funny."

His words were being squeaked out amongst great, thundering laughter.

"Somebody tried to give coffee to that tree. Trees don't drink coffee. They drink water. This is SO silly."

Oh, to be the delightful age where you get so much joy and laughter from litter.




Sunday, October 18, 2015

'The Boy' Trailer Reminds us the Importance of Following the Rules


You'd think over 30 years after Stripe and his gremlin buddies trashed Kingston Falls that people would learn that you absolutely need to follow the rules given to you by mysterious elderly folks for caring for the supernatural. Especially Laura Cohan should know the importance of strict regulations to survive after all her time with hungry zombies. Yet here she is not taking a creepy doll seriously and if she is going to work in a creepy Gothic mansion then she needs to appease the poltergeists. The Boy is scheduled for release in January, which is usually time for the jump-scare infested and non-demanding horror to appease all the movie goers overstuffed on the Oscar bait and want easily digestible and faithful-to-formula genre fare. Trailer suggests it is coming out at exactly the right time, but maybe this will follow a previous STX release, The Gift, by being far more than the marketing suggests.


Monday, October 12, 2015

The Breakdown of Wes Craven Podcast


Back in August we lost an iconic filmmaker and hero among the horror movie lovers in Wes Craven. So, it is way long overdue that two guys who felt that their film tastes were formed and their creative fires were sparked by his works would finally get around to appropriately celebrating his career. This week Scott and I review five Wes Craven pictures, which are his redefining '90s slasher picture, Scream; his innovative reimagining of his most popular picture in New Nightmare; his attempt at horror comedy in the Eddie Murphy vehicle Vampire in Brooklyn; a claustrophobic thriller in Red Eye; and finally one of his rare straight dramas in the Meryl Streep starring Music of the Heart.

As always if you love the show then please spread the word.



Rating Rundown:

Scream **** (CS) & ***½ (SM)
Wes Craven's New Nightmare *** (CS) & ***½ (SM)
Vampire in Brooklyn * (CS & SM)
Red Eye *** (CS & SM)
Music of the Heart *** (CS & SM)

Critical Darling Draft Pick: 

Scott: 30 points  

1. Carol  
2. Brooklyn  
3. Macbeth  
4. 99 Homes - 15 points
5. Joy
6. Good Dinosaur
7. Suffragette
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room
10. Sicario - 15 points

Christopher: 10 points

1. The Revenant
2. The Danish Girl
3. Spotlight
4. I Saw the Light
5. Crimson Peak
6. Steve Jobs - 10 points 
7. Youth
8. Truth  
9. Our Brand is Crisis  
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens

Monday, October 05, 2015

The Breakdown of 'The Martian', 'Sicario', 'Rope' and 'Song One'

This week Scott and I review some highly anticipated new releases in the Ridley Scott survival adventure, The Martian, and Denis Villeneuve's latest dark thriller, Sicario. From there we discuss a cinematic classic in Alfred Hitchcock's Rope and as well the independent 2015 Anne Hathaway drama, Song One. From there we discuss the current big studio system and debate if it is crushing creative and innovative directors. As always if you enjoy the show then please spread the love.

Star Rating Rundown:
The Martian ***½ (CS & SM)
Sicario *** (CS) & ***½ (SM)
Rope **** (CS & SM)
Song One ** (CS) & *(SM)

Critical Darling Draft Picks:

Scott: 30 points

1. Carol
2. Brooklyn
3. Macbeth
4. 99 Homes - 15 points 
5. Joy
6. Good Dinosaur
7. Suffragette
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room
10. Sicario - 15 points

Christopher:

1. The Revenant
2. The Danish Girl
3. Spotlight
4. I Saw the Light
5. Crimson Peak
6. Steve Jobs
7. Youth
8. Truth
9. Our Brand is Crisis
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens

Monday, September 28, 2015

The Breakdown of 'Everest', 'Black Mass', 'The Intern', 'Ex Machina', and 'The Cobbler' Podcast

This week Scott and I celebrate hitting our 109th episode of the Breakdown by returning to the Siskel & Ebert format that we were using a year ago. We do it with style by offering up reviews for five 2015 releases. We have the big disaster epic, Everest; the James "Whitey" Bulger crime biopic in Black Mass, the latest Anne Hathaway comedy, The Intern; the critically acclaimed sci-fi thriller Ex Machina; an indy comedy starring Adam Sandler, The Cobbler. It was a lot of fun returning to the old format and hopefully, you love it just as much. If you do then as always please spread the word.



Rating Rundown:

Everest ***½ (CS) & *** (SM)
Black Mass ** (CS) & *** (SM)
The Intern *** (CS & SM)
Ex Machina **** (CS & SM)
The Cobbler * (CS) & *½ (SM)

The Critical Darlings Game Update:

Scott: 30 points

1. Carol
2. Brooklyn 
3. Macbeth 
4. 99 Homes - 15 points
5. Joy 
6. Good Dinosaur 
7. Suffragette 
8. Hateful Eight
9. Room 
10. Sicario - 15 points

Christopher: 

1. The Revenant 
2. The Danish Girl 
3. Spotlight 
4. I Saw the Light 
5. Crimson Peak 
6. Steve Jobs 
7. Youth 
8. Truth 
9. Our Brand is Crisis
10. Star Wars VII: Force Awakens

Friday, September 18, 2015

The Mysterious and Emotionally Charged Force Field at Everett's School


In an effort to be a bit more personal on the site again, I detailed Everett's first "not-actual" first day of school, then his real first day of school, and then what I learned as a parent from Everett's first day of school. But Everett has now gone to school for over a week, so it's time to move on from that first day.

I've noticed a rather mystical occurrence at the school that maybe Scully and Mulder should investigate. It has been obvious that Everett is having a great time at school and even his teacher remarked he has acclimated quickly considering he is still three and never had experience in daycare. Speaking of his teacher, every time her name is mentioned at home, he gets a shy smile and gleefully mentions she is pretty, in a clear sign my son has a teacher crush (one of the grand coming of age experiences that every boy deserve even if many may get robbed) Throughout the evening into the morning preparation then spilled into our walk, he will not only regale me with stories of his time at school but also excitedly tell me about his plans for that day. One day he talked about how he needed to bring his miniature toy magnifying glass to school because his teacher could use it since she always talks about "discovering."

Then at the beginning of this week, something would happen the moment the school came into our vision. The excitement would puff away and Everett would chant how he didn't want to go to school. It was as if we walk through a force field that altered his demeanor and shoved in irrational fear. Some may think it was the towering students that ran around the property who may be intimidating Everett, but I prefer the mysterious force field theory.

Then the school bell would trigger outright panic where Everett would cling to me and demonstrate Herculean strength forcing his teacher into a monumental battle of tug-of-war. He'd pull away from the door as if it were the gates of hell or a screening for I, Frankenstein. He'd bellow out cries that are more violent and anguished then when he got stung by a bee earlier this week (for that, it hardly even warranted a few tears according to his teacher). I've been informed that the moment he hits the carpet and it is time for school to commence, the effect of the force field and emotional triggering bell wears off. He is back to the excited and joyful boy that I love and get at home.

The fact it was a few days ago that I planned to reveal this nasty conspiracy to the world has meant the mastermind has already softened his torture. On Wednesday, we got onto the grounds without any chants for escape and it wasn't until the bell that some tears seeped through. Even then it wasn't a titanic struggle and it was just some mild protestation as a teacher took him into the building.

The last two days he just needed a light tap towards the teacher and promises of seeing a caterpillar to get him moving on. It looks like a day where Everett doesn't force me to hide my heartbreak and witness his emotional transformation may be very near.

Then again, the weekend is almost upon us and it gives that dreaded mastermind a chance to re-power the force field on Monday.

Executing That Bastard Before It Can Do Damage


My plan is to do a hefty amount of reviews for the TV Fall Premiere season to test my theory that pieces about shows draw in greater traffic than movies. I had intended to write quickie reviews for Late Show with Stephen Colbert, Best Time Ever with Neil Patrick Harris, and The Bastard Executioner, which are all patiently waiting on my PVR. The time to watch them is dwindling because next week the insanity of the series roll outs really gets into gear plus the cinemas are now loading up with tantalizing fare that will be demanding written reviews as well. Plus there is that pesky client work and other projects, and from last I checked, I'm still a father and husband. The ax needs to be swung down for chopping and Kurt Sutter's latest foray seems the best victim. I never joined the Sons of Anarchy party and so I wanted to jump on his latest project to see what type of magic he can wield. It looks like I should keep Southpaw as the lone work from him that I've seen (a movie that I love the acting and as well the directing of the boxing scenes, but not impressed with the formulaic script he wrote).

The reviews aren't smoking hot for his story about a man seeking revenge so he creates a fake persona in order to get close to his enemies and exact revenge. It sounds eerily familiar, but it also isn't like we can't have yet another take on The Count of Monte Cristo, considering it is a classic. This also is being described as a blood soaked, sword swinging and bare skinned jumped into a heavy cloak of darkness. More specifically, an over-the-top action drama that is played super-serious and morbid. The hero just plunges thicker into self-destruction and surrounds himself with greater problems. So what seems to be the Sutter way of storytelling based off what I know about Anarchy and The Shield. I'm sure it will have its fans and I may be making a mistake bailing before even seeing the premiere, but this sounds like an atrocious chore, especially when I can get my medieval-style fix from many other places. I already got my fill of ridiculousness squeezed dry by a serious and somber tone that is tricked into thinking it is meaningful and important with dreck like The Gunman and Chappie earlier this year. I'll bail until someone slaps me around and yells at me that I'm making a big mistake.

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

The Movie Breakdown Episode 108 Podcast: M. Night Shyamalan Returns to His Roots with 'The Visit', and Robert Redford and Nick Nolte are Great Company in Subpar 'A Walk in the Woods'


After being three weeks away, Scott and I return to the cinemas to sample some of 2015's latest offering. Speaking of big returns, we review M. Night Shyamalan's latest horror-thriller in the found footage scary old people movie, The Visit. Will this be his chance to finally reclaim some past glory and prove himself to be the talented filmmaker that was evident in Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, and Signs? I also review the new adult-centric comedy starring Robert Redford and Nick Nolte, A Walk in the Woods, and then we review another 2015 found footage thriller, Creep. We also talk about the state of found footage and what is needed to make that type of style effective. We deviate a little bit from movies as well as I talk about Everett's first week at school and we celebrate the 30th birthday of Super Mario Brothers.

As always if you love the show then please spread the word.




Review Rundown:

The Visit *** (CS & SM)
Creep *** (CS) & ***½ (SM)
A Walk in the Woods **½ (CS)

Friday, September 11, 2015

Any Time is the Right Time to Go 'Back to the Future'


Director Jason Aron's Back in Time doc is likely to be fluffy and light with lots of retreading of anecdotes and production notes that have been covered in many of the past extras on the several Back to the Future boxsets. It is pretty amazing what is essentially an intimate and endearing story about family relationships and the impact they have on each other became one of the monster hits of the 1980s that remains an all-time favourite for many (me included). It is time travel and sci-fi that appealed to many who claimed to detest the genre because it was always much deeper and about a whole lot more than that. The time travel was just the catalyst to get us into the real heart and soul, and 30 years later this is a movie that still pulls off the sentimentality because it trusted and cared about its characters. This documentary may end up just being a feature-length DVD extra, but Back to the Future is a movie worth revisiting constantly and I never tire of hearing about it. Plus this brief trailer prove once again why Michael J. Fox was a superstar in the 1980s and maybe one of the most likable movie stars ever.


Jeepers Creepers, We're Doing This Again


According to THR, it looks like Jeepers Creepers 3 is going to be a thing. The financer Myriad Pictures is launching their new genre label, Scoundrel, which means this will be one of their first projects. I realize Jeepers Creepers somehow has stumbled its way to having a cult following with some horror buffs and I've read a fair amount of praise for the original (while the sequel usually gets panned), but I'm going to have to throw up my hands in bafflement on this one. The first time I saw Jeepers Creepers was based off a recommendation from a friend and after seeing the movie, I started accepting applications for his replacement. He was definitely banned from going to Blockbuster with us (back when that place wasn't an ancient tale to wow the young ones).

I found the protagonists to be irritating and the run from the big scary just seemed like formulaic horror. Also the whole scene with the baddie sprouting wings led the movie down a path of ridiculousness and the mythology felt like something they sorted out on a napkin in between takes. But again, I know there are many horror fans that loved the original and are likely salivating for director Victor Salva's return to that dark world.

If this was a franchise that needed to continue, this is the right time for it. The horror scene is still stuffed with haunted houses and unseen poltergeists that prank poor families. We seem to be heading towards the end of this trend and so it is time for the next horror subgenre to crawl out of its tomb. The Creeper (I guess that is his name) is an actual living monster that has heavy slasher leanings, which compared to the modern landscape is almost fresh and original. It likely won't be those things, but it is at least a change. The production better get scooting since movies like Krampus are going to have a jump on the stalking monster genre, though Jeepers Creepers will likely at least try to play it straight (I seem to remember laughing more than I should in the original).

These Kids Today. . . They Aren't So Bad


One of the favourite subjects among the "it isn't like it used to be" crowds is the degradation of values and respect in today's children. Of course, these doomsayers seem a little oblivious to the fact that the golden oldies have been whining about the disrespect and corruption of youth since youth was a thing. There has been articles and studies to show that kids and youth today aren't a pitchfork away from becoming the devils that some fear, but these pieces usually are not easily found on Yahoo News, so it gets ignored.

As Everett and I slithered to his school today (maybe it was just me fearing we were going to be late but I think my son owns shoes entirely made of molasses), I noticed a lack of trees lit on fire, rocks being lobbed into windows, or even kids being glued to their cell phones. I actually didn't see a single kid with any form of electronic device, which may be due to a school-wide ban that I'm unaware exists but there was plenty of playground fun and eye-to-eye contact talking going on.

My biggest discovery that the apocalypse may be on hold is when Everett and I were walking on the pathway at the school that leads to the kindergarten area. There was a rather large congregation of older boys hanging out on the way to our destination and I could sense from Everett grabbing for my hand it was a bit intimidating. The moment we got closer to the crowd, one boy said "watch out." and the crowd dispersed and allowed us easy passage.

This seems like a meaningless thing, but actually, it is huge. Because I didn't have to say "excuse me" and the boys were aware enough to know that they were possibly blocking the way for a very young and nervous little boy. They didn't expect us to walk around them or try to break through their huddle.

I couldn't tell you how many times I've had to tell a group of adults to please move aside and allow passage for my small child. Sometimes they move right away and apologize, other times they grunt while lightly moving their shoulders to the side, and other times they seem to have lost all hearing or sense of reality. My point being the kids have proven to be far more polite and cognizant of their surroundings than almost every adult that I've encountered in public.

This is today's proof that our future may just be fine after all. Well, until they become adults.

Thursday, September 10, 2015

10 Things I Learned After My Child's First Day of School


Everett finally had his first day of school yesterday despite my protests and attempts to turn the couch into a time machine. Even though I'm not really sure if Everett has learned anything new yet, as a first time parent of a young student, I've definitely become much wiser. Here are 10 things I learned from Everett's first day of school.

1. Teachers can be just as baffled as the parents by the grumpy lady that blocks them from taking their child to the classroom, which is why kindergarten has its own "secret" entrance.

2. Your child will swear up and down that his teacher didn't give anything to take home or provide any information for the coming days, what he really means is "you need to dig to the very far corner of my school bag where I stuffed all the really important things."

3. Asking "yes" and "no" questions are really great ways to practice the pronunciation of "yes" but otherwise, just a rather pointless way to pass time.

4.  On the first day of school the child goes on a "hunt", but the teacher clearly forgot to bury the treasure.

5. The new game after school will be "discerning fact from fiction" though one should assume all stories involving wrestling lions and flying to the sun are partly fabricated.


6. The second best feeling after seeing your child at the end of the school day is noticing that he is still wearing the shorts that he had on in the morning.

7. If your children refuse to tell you what they did that day, then just check their arms and hands for the story.

8. It only takes one day for all things spoken by the teacher to be law burned from above on unbreakable stone that even parents must bow towards, such as shoes that must stay at the school to avoid all who go off the premises turning to dust.

9. Apparently, after the teachers are done "playing" with the kids during the day, they go to work.

10. The blessed silence of an uninterrupted work day is a marvelous thing but is greatly surpassed by the joys of the chaos and noise that return at 4.



Wednesday, September 09, 2015

The Real First Day of School. . . Honest


The very observant reader may notice that today is Wednesday and places like Google were touting yesterday as the first day of school. I believed such a thing to be true for Everett until the surprise phone call from his teacher at about ten to eight yesterday morning. I thoroughly detailed the first major twist in Everett's school adventure in yesterday's post.

As well yesterday, I detailed the accumulation of anxiety and volcanic emotions over my boy entering his next big significant change in his life and the signifier that he is miles away from being my baby boy anymore. Though he didn't officially go to school yesterday, I did get to feel out an Everett-free day as he ventured off to 'Grandma School.'

Since I got all the fretting and emotional roller coastering rolling before that fateful teacher phone call, I started off this morning feeling rather flat. I knew this was the first real shipping off into a new and strange land, but the mind and heart already did the twisting and turning on Tuesday. It sort of felt like the routine had already begun. Or at least that was how it was when I was getting Everett ready for school. Today, Everett was even more cemented to his bed and less thrilled about the prospect of calling it morning. He tried to convince me that since it was still dark out that it can't be morning.


The reality is that Brantford is a cloudy and rainy day; this is why the sun bailed on his first day of school. I assume it was the angels doing all the crying for me so I didn't embarrass myself in public. For a boy who bases the time of day on how bright his room is without the light switch turned on and also seemed to have used up his first day adrenaline yesterday, the darkness was the enemy in getting him motivated to kick-off the day.

Though once breakfast was being consumed and the lunch bag started getting packed along with me spouting the hype of meeting new people and playing new games, Everett started the bouncing and giddiness over the new adventure. Once breakfast ended, the "why aren't we going to school yet" kicked in, which is the clearest sign Everett was excited. Though the promise he could play with his puzzles while we continued to get ready seemed to be an even greater prospect.


My vision of Everett's first day of school didn't quite mesh with reality. First of all, I had plans of a nice family walk to his school, but the wall of rain suggested a car ride would be much better. Everett also was amped for a walk but we convinced him that going for a swim would be better after school and in a pool.

When we arrived at the school, while I was trying to acquire the skill of holding an umbrella and a baby (I have enough trouble mastering the science of positioning an umbrella so it doesn't get caught in the wind when I have two free hands), Everett told Emily he was scared. Emily reassured him that was a good feeling and school would be amazing. It is best that I didn't find out about Everett's fear until I got home. At this point the butterflies where ruling the stomach and the emotions of the Tuesday where back with the added power of the real physical school building taunting me. Reassuring my son would be a harder task with my face full of streaming tears and my voice wobbling with searing emotions.


I had imagined the first day of school to be an event where I meet the teacher and get to scout out the arena that would hold his education for the year. I'd give him a bearhug and get one last glimpse as he jetted towards the puzzles. Much like me thinking he was going to school on Tuesday or that Neill Blomkamp would make great movies after District 9, it was pure fiction.

Instead, we were greeted at the door by a lady who swooped in to snatch Everett's hand and told him to say good-bye. That would have been that if it wasn't for Emily requesting that we at least take one more picture of our boy who was experiencing school for the first time ever in his life. Then I, of course, needed to give him one more hug and kiss, because otherwise, I likely would have turned into sentient Jell-O without the final contact.


Then Everett took the hand of the mystery lady (I'm pretty sure she didn't even offer her name) then she passed him off to a student who led him down the hallway as Everett's gigantic saucer-eyes scanned the mysterious new location. He looked back as his parents became smaller and smaller and everything turned stranger and stranger. That was Everett's first experience and from there it is all unknown to me.


I have no clue what his classroom looks like. His teacher at this point is nothing more than a voice on the other end of the phone. I don't even know if she has a body or is human. Maybe that is why they didn't want me to go to the classroom. They didn't want it revealed that she is a radioactive chipmunk with the power to speak and recite the alphabet. Or maybe she is nothing more than a benevolent spirit who loves children and goes by the name Casper.

I think I will need to insist on meeting the teacher when I pick him up in a few hours.


Tuesday, September 08, 2015

First Day of School . . . Oops, Not Really

For the last week, Emily and I have been preparing Everett for the major life milestone that would be his first day of school. Though considering Everett never had daycare or an older sibling, school isn't anything more than some word and the thing that will stop him from having "Grandma Day" in the middle of the week. The real reason for the constant mentioning of school and talking up the big day has been to actually console myself and convince me that indeed Everett going off to school is a great thing.

Everett vanishing for seven hours a day has some incredible upside with the biggest being that an entire block of time will be devoted to my writing career that won't be interrupted by declarations that I'm now Baloo and we much dance to "The Bare Necessities." But the seven hours of uninterrupted time is also something I've lived without for 3 years and the days just aren't going to be the same without my imaginative and energetic buddy constantly mixing things up.

To be honest, my own despair and fear of Everett starting school has less to do with his absence and more to the fact this is indisputable proof that my baby boy is growing up. From this point on in his life, he is going to have some kind of responsibility during weekdays. It is also the first time that he will be away for a long period of time and have other influences latching on to him. It is step one in tarnishing his innocence or at least, my own manufactured version of his innocence that I've been promoting for his entire lifetime.

Many of the funny quirks and thoughts that Everett has showcased are now destined to either evolve or be entirely wiped out as he gets exposed to new kids and presented with different worldviews. This is all great, but part of me wants to snuggle with him and never let go of the boy who believes (and sees) a hippo lives in our pond and that when you burp the food in your stomach is pushed into your feet.

Today was the day everything was about to change and Everett was going to become a student. Except it wasn't. Rather it turned out to be my first experience with the joys of school administration and a reminder why it is great to have a grandma nearby.

The problem all starts with me, which Emily will attest is often the case. The plan for the last year has been to enroll Everett in the local French Immersion School. We heard the very dangerous words of "if you live in the surrounding area of the school then you are automatically accepted." So, that gave us the leisure time to debate if we enroll Everett, especially since Emily wasn't entirely convinced she wanted to go this route over the traditional elementary school in our area. June seemed to be a good time to finally getting around to that whole enrollment thing, and it was then that we were informed that Everett was on a waiting list. My first lesson in not trusting what I'm told.

Since the school of choice was no longer a definite thing, I quickly enrolled him at the public school in our area. Then it was the summer waiting game of finding out if we'd get our first choice but safe in the knowledge Everett was officially enrolled in the second school that was a real guarantee.

Last week, we got the phone call that Everett was still chilling on the waiting list and it would remain that way when school started. He may still get into the school, but for now it was recommended he goes to the school in his area. We actually received a package that comfortably explained everything I needed to know about the French Immersion School. I didn't have a single thing from the other school other than some fresh new anxiety over what war zone I'd be throwing Everett into.

I made a phone call in hopes of getting some reassurance or least confirmation on what first day of school protocol would be like. The person I ended up talking to was obsessed with Everett's urinary habits rather than letting me know much about the school. What I did get out of the conversation was that I take him to school on the Tuesday at around 8:45 and his name would be called out by his teacher. It seemed easy enough and I was glad to know that the binge drinking could begin promptly at 9:30 after Everett had been dropped off and I got a good cry out of my system.

Thus this whole past weekend we hyped Everett up for his first day of school. I started practice "not crying in public." Everett got what I assume was a good night's sleep and I woke up every other hour after dreams about Everett being swept away by an underground Jell-O eating cult.

I got my first taste of a wonderful school morning where I orchestrated a song and dance routine to get Everett to roll out of his bed. I continued to get him juiced up for his exciting first day while he would rather watch videos about animal noises. He was finally riled up to go, then the phone call came.

A phone call from his teacher. A lady who seems really nice and will likely be an amazing teacher for Everett. Except he didn't see her today. It appears that Everett's school still adopts the staggered days. Something that would have been nice to be told in my conversation last week or read on the school website that doesn't seem to have been updated since April (but I at least know all the pizza days that were planned for that month; I'm sure they were delicious). Today was only for the Senior Kindergarten kids, then half of the JK on Wednesday, the other half on Thursday, and then the whole party on Friday where things swing into routine.

Now, before you sharpen up the pitchforks and light the torches, the teacher is innocent here. I'm not just saying that because she has a really cute phone voice. To her credit, she sent out an email detailing school routine at the start of August. Something I missed because even though I registered months ago, apparently Everett's name didn't show up on her class list until this past weekend. Which started making me wonder if Everett would have even been registered if I didn't make my "overly concerned parent" call last week.

She did give me the option to take him in today. This also meant that my 3 year old who has never gone to day care or anything resembling school gets to spend his first day with kids that will likely tower over him and be at least a year removed from "accidents" Even though Everett was in school mode and very excited to head on the adventure, I also wanted to make sure his first day sizzled and rocked and was as cry-free as possible (at least for him).

Of course, this means he was bummed by the "no school" news. He wasn't really up for an explanation. But what he was up for was going to "Grandma School" where he currently is and enjoying one last weekday where she throws all her attention upon him.

This is why it is good that I never followed the dreams of 18 year old Christopher where I moved out to Vancouver, because that would have been an awfully long trip to cheer up my little student.